The Mystery that is Marriage

"I .... take you .... to be my wife (or husband), to have and to hold, bla bla bla... till death do us part.."

Those are marriage vows. Promises made by couples during a wedding ceremony. I guess you are wondering why i am telling you the obvious. Truth is, we who are outside that institution have so many unanswered questions.

"Does love last forever?"

"What changes occur five years down the road? Or when children come into the picture?

But the one that has really inspired this article is;

"Should people really get married?"

There are so many perturbing love situations making rounds on the radio Late Date shows and in Newspapers Love columns. So many young people (70% of my country's population) are challenged by their relationships. Everyday, a caller or writer is seeking advice from the listeners or readers. The relationship problems range from mistrust, lack of attention, stingy partner, intrusion from in-laws to cheating spouses - this being the most predominant.

We could excuse the non-marrieds. They are probably testing the waters before they commit to "The One". But the marrieds, what's up?

Why take the vows, throw a grand lavish ceremony with all the fancy outfits, costly musician appearances, a bridal and groom squad and the banquets when you do not want commitment? For an average couple, most of these splendind festivities are financed by well wishers who are tactfully coerced (forgive my language) through multiple wedding meetings into contributing, all in the name of showing support to the couple.

After all this hustle, the once lovely couple cannot stand each other. It is one exuse after another for infidelity. Young girls get to hear statements like, "I don't love my wife!", "Wish I had met you earlier" from older married men persuing them. And when the young belles give in (like they always do), it marks the beginning of a sad marriage story.

The home becomes a silent war zone. Each party cannot tolerate the other's foibles and they end up finding solace in their 'side dishes'. One would rather hang in a bar from 5-10pm daily after work than face his/her once to-die-for spouse.

"Why did i get married?" As a result, so many marrieds find themselves asking this question. Should we believe it is that bad? Is there no hope left for the unmarrieds in anticipation?

I guess we may never find out until we find ourselves at the altar, shot by Cupid's arrow and reciting those same exact marriage vows.